DIARY OF A PLAYBOY (By Stephen Toochi)

“Oh my! The event planner must have been an expert.“ thoughts ran through my mind.

The chandeliers glowed, the fluorescent bulbs lit up the whole hall, the chairs, all of them had white and purple colored ribbons attached, the tables were well decorated, the ushers were in a uniform of white and purple dresses, my gaze went up at the cake which stood before the couple’s stand.

The thing was enormous, its three steps reminded me of a Christmas tree. The style of decoration was different as the picture of the couple was used as the ice. After my sightseeing, I felt compelled to organize a wedding ceremony.

I began the walk to my seat, flanked on the right by my girlfriend Blessing, whose hand was entwined with mine. I have always been a man of modest dressing, I wore a purple shirt, black trousers and a slip-on pair of shoes.

Blessing has always been classy; today she lived up to the name. She was downing a long purple gown, the type that cleans the floor, on her chest, tiny shiny stones could be seen and her head tie was just not for fashion and covering but for trouble. She depicted a picture of a lady any man would be proud of.

As we settled on our seats, people with different styles of dressing, fashion sense, jewelry, and make-ups filled the hall, faces were beaming with smiles while others were indifferent. I sat up as the band started a rendition of “Oruka” by Sunny Nneji, the couple was ushered in, and the groomsmen with their bridesmaids started off; with dances like ballet and Atilogu fused together.

I watched as my girlfriend salivated, jotting down things in her pad, the groomsmen were magnificent, whoever designed their outfits crafted a masterpiece, their white shirts were tucked in black trousers and covered with a purple blazer. The ladies were also on top of their game, downing flamboyant dresses, the same braided hairstyle, silver necklaces, and six-inch heels.

As they danced, the couple made their grand entrance, and the groomsmen, and bridesmaids parted in halves giving the couple a guard of honor and a smooth passage. I darted my eyes to the couple’s stand and saw no seat, before I could give it another thought, a white wooden seat dropped bit by bit from the ceiling down to the floor.

The crowd was sent into a frenzy, and flashes of camera blinded my eyes, I smiled and said to myself “This is magnificent!”.

The smiles and laughter on people’s lips cemented the fact that we are happy people in my country.

As all this was happening, my girlfriend whom I had forgotten her presence tapped my shoulder.

“Honey, I’d like to wear that type of gown on our wedding day, which should be next year right?” she said pointing to the bride’s gown with plasters of smiles on her painted face.

“Uhmm,” I smirked sipping the water on my table.

“You’d wear something better darling,” I concluded mirroring her face and omitting the last question.

“Next year, right?” Her voice came hard again, she stared at me with one hand on her jaw.

“Baby, you don’t discuss stuff like this at someone’s party. Wait let’s get home first. You trust me, don’t you?” My voice and face came assured and she had no choice but to nod in agreement.

A few minutes later, something caught her attention as she pointed at those downing asoebi and said,

“We’d use a better and more beautiful dress than theirs, right honey?”.

I couldn’t hold my patience but I held my tongue, who the hell is the “we” she was referring to? ‘This one is taking this thing seriously’.

Then her “hmm?” which echoed her questions forced an answer from me.

“Don’t worry baby, when the time comes, I’d never settle for less. You know I’ve got the taste right?”

“Yeah baby,” she said amidst giggles and chuckles, holding and pressing down my fingers while the fanfare of a ceremony continued.

If only she knew my intention of breaking up with her and dating three more ladies before getting married, she’d never have thought of me as a prospective spouse.

© Stephen Toochi
#StephStories

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About the author

I'm Dav-Oz, and  I'm the Chief Editor of The Dav-Oz Blog, a graphic designer and upcoming fashion designer.

I'm just your regular young Nigerian lad with dreams and hope for a better future.

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