TWENTY-TWENTY-DO (2022 DOs & DON’Ts) By Terry Kalum

Happy New Year! It’s been so long and I’m sure you’ve missed me. You have, don’t deny it.

You know, everyone makes new year resolutions, most forget all about them before the first month is over and most don’t even make it past the first week; still, everyone makes new year resolutions. So, before we begin our rantings for this year (and boy do we have a lot to rant about), here are some things you should resolve to do or not do this year

  1. Become a Feminist.

Yeap, we are starting with currently the most controversial topic amongst the woke community. I could give a 9hour TED talk on why you should become a feminist but Chimmamanda already beat me to that, I’ll just say this; this year resolve to believe women deserve as much as you a man does and women, see yourselves as worthy of everything you can possibly imagine.  Decide to not treat women differently or be prejudiced towards them simply because of the body they were born in. This new year, see women not as things for your sexual gratification or people to be objectified. See them as just people, deserving of the same respect as yourself, regardless of sex.

  1. Be Tolerant.

It’s difficult to accept something one finds difficult relating to. One of the reasons people are reluctant in accepting people of different sexual orientation, different religion, different opinion is because they don’t relate to the experience. But tolerance has nothing to do with whether or not you subscribe to s belief system or an idea, tolerance is the bedrock of humanity. It’s one of the Cardinal rules of existence – the ability to exist and let others do too. This year, decide to listen to the other side, find a common ground, see queer people as people, not people who need help or Jesus or a taste of vagina. See them as people. People who have a different sexual orientation, doesn’t make them not human or bound to hell or in need of your intervention. This year accept things you have no control over, things you can’t change.

  1. Educate Yourself.

The best decision you could do, is deciding to educate yourself. Read. Read everything. Don’t form half-baked opinions from twitter threads. Don’t form opinions because you watched a video of Chimmamanda speaking or of Trump cussing out an entire country. Read up on issues. Be slow to spill trash on the internet this year, don’t show your illiterate @$$ to the world. Watch videos, read dissertations, read articles, follow the news. Don’t criticize vaccination because your pastor said so, don’t advocate for vaccination because VP Kamala Harris says to. Make your findings and if at the end, they align with that of another person, it’s totally fine to adopt that person’s view but don’t ignorantly follow an idea without having your facts to back it up.

  1. Protect Yourself.

But for fear of appearing too dramatic, I’d have repeated this thrice. Understand that your protection is your responsibility. I preach abstinence, partly because I still hear my mum telling us if your trousers touch a girl’s skirt, she’d get pregnant. So glad I don’t have to worry about that happening. Anyway, in the event you could no longer abstain, it’s very important you have all the right information to better protect yourself. This new year, learn to use condoms. There’re a whole variety of condoms that it’s mind boggling, find your brand. Having unprotected sex is not a sign of trust nor is it a form of intimacy, you’re having sex, doesn’t get more intimate than that. Get tested regularly, know your status and if you’re reactive, get on your medication. It’s no secret people living with HIV can lead full long lives. HIV is not a death sentence, as cliché as it may sound and it sure does, it’s the absolute truth. Get tested regularly, arm yourself this year. Also ladies, Own your bodies. The argument surrounding reproductive rights has gone on for as long as humans were born. This year, decide to take charge of your own body, if you don’t want the baby, allow no one pressure you into keeping it. Getting married to a man solely because he got you pregnant is the prerequisite for a toxic marriage. You alone decide what to do with your body.

  1. Finally, Ladies, Learn to Say No.

If you do not want the sexual advancements, let him know in the strongest of terms. GUYS, NO MEANS NO. It doesn’t mean try harder, it doesn’t mean the girt is trying to be coy or playing hard to get, it simply means No. This new year, ladies, say No to unwanted sexual advancements, unwanted flirtations, groping, catcalling or any uncomfortable situation. Guys, learn to accept rejection. Don’t be a rapist, rape enabler or sexual predator. In summary, don’t be a creep.

Oh, and this year decide to read ROAFYG regularly and comment too.

XOXO.

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About the author

I'm Dav-Oz, and  I'm the Chief Editor of The Dav-Oz Blog, a graphic designer and upcoming fashion designer.

I'm just your regular young Nigerian lad with dreams and hope for a better future.

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